I'm sure you've seen this Monty Python classic, yes?
Well, how's this for an encore?
Woman spends £50,000 on sick parrot which finally loses fight for life
Anne Lowery spent the money on chemotherapy for her 42 year-old pet Areba after the bird was diagnosed with cancer.
However, the Wagler's Conure parakeet died after 13 months of treatment.
Ms Lowery, a tax expert from Florida who has 11 other parrots, said she was glad for the extra months with Areba who she had raised for 30 years.
She said: "When they said she had cancer, they gave her two months to live. It seemed such an aggressive time frame, so I thought nothing of putting her into the vets' care."
The parrot passed away on Wednesday.
Dr Teresa Lightfoot, the vet who cared for Areba, said: "It was tough for Areba. But we improved her quality of life and gave her and her mom more time together."
This actually isn't funny at all. The same money would probably have been able, to think of just one possibility, to get some child a badly-needed life-saving operation. Not that either Ms. Lowery or her vet cared a damn. And why should they, right? It's Ms. Lowery's money after all. And if she considers her pets' welfare to be more important than that of some human being she doesn't even know and basically doesn't give a shit about, that's her business, is it not?